The End Of All Things
by Short Ninja
Summary: Not part of All Is Golden Universe. Cailan and Rome grew up inseparable, eventually falling in love. Love wouldn't be such a problem if Cailan wasn't already promised to the daughter of his father's best friend. Rome would always love Cailan, and she learns that sometimes love just isn't enough. Cailan/Cousland.
1. Chapter 1

He kissed her tears away. She should be angry, livid even at him. But it wasn't in her heart to. She slipped a hand in Cailan's golden hair and guided his lips to hers.

"I love you, I love you the very most." He whispered when they finally pulled away. He didn't have to tell her. She knew. Cailan's long and graceful fingers threaded through hers. "I will always be yours."

"Marry me then."

"Rome, I love you." She turned from him. "Please, look at me."

But she didn't. The Cousland girl picked her pride up from the floor and stood. She kissed Cailan once more.

"Cailan Theirin, I love you so much it hurts. And if you think you _have_ to marry Anora when _you_ are the crown prince, then so be it."

She walked out of the door, head held high. Until she got back to her room and saw Nathaniel sitting on her bed. He opened his arms for her and she curled into the comfort he allowed her.

* * *

Life went on without the crown prince. She threw herself into her studies, into her rogue training and everything in between. She constantly ached for Cailan, for his soft touches, even for the sound of his voice.

They exchanged letters often. His letters oftentimes begged her to come live at the castle as his advisor. She read between his lines. _Become my mistress, because I find Anora unbearable. _He often signed his letters with his name and rank, and in the smallest scrawl he could manage 'she's not you'.

And every letter she refused him. She refused to go to the palace and have him dangled in front of her, because Maker damn everything she was still a Cousland. She didn't have to be a mistress to the prince if she didn't desire it.

A few months after settling back into life without her golden Cailan, word spread through Ferelden of the King's disappearance. Her mother was appalled at the idea of her staying in the castle._ He has a fiancée in case you've forgotten_. Her mother thought her intentions were less than pure.

Her father didn't though. Bryce Cousland hugged his youngest child to his chest and held her as she cried. She cried for Cailan and for King Maric. It was something she hadn't allowed herself to do. Once she had stop crying her father started talking.

"I understand, my dear girl. You wish nothing more than to be there for Cailan in this most difficult time. I also understand you are now eighteen. You're a young woman. If you wish to become an advisor to the Prince, I won't stop you."

Rome bowed lowly to her father.

"Thank you so much father."

* * *

She walked the familiar halls of the castle. She had no entourage, no group of ladies to surround her. Even Kuma had stayed in her room. She knocked on the door to Cailan's study and the door was opened. Loghain and Anora were speaking with Cailan, who currently had his eyes narrowed at the both of them.

As soon as his eyes met hers, his expression softened considerably.

"Loghain, Anora. If you would excuse us."

Loghain scowled at her, and Anora gave her the most piercing look she could manage. Rome couldn't care less though.

"Oh no, if I'm interrupting something I can always come back later."

Cailan stood, looking Anora and Loghain straight in the eyes.

"No, you weren't interrupting anything."

Anora kissed Cailan's cheek before leaving. He paid her no mind. He only had eyes for the Cousland before him.

"Lock the door if you will."

She did as he asked. Cailan took her face in gentle hands.

"I never thought you would come."

"I _had_ to Cailan. I couldn't leave you here alone."

Cailan said nothing before bringing her to him. She rested cheek against his shoulder.

"I've missed you so, my dear girl."

"I missed you too." She whispered back. They stood, entangled in each other for what seemed like hours. She finally spoke up. "Would you like to talk about it?"

She looked up at Cailan who was smiling softly at her.

"Not right now, love. Anora and Loghain have been bugging me ever since we found out. I know nothing about where my father went and no matter how they pester me, my answer won't change."

She stayed quiet. Cailan's lips met hers for a moment. She kissed him back just for a moment. She wanted him so terribly bad.

"I still love you." He murmured, stroking her cheek.

"We can't, and you know that."

He ignored her headings and kissed her once more. His tongue slipped in her mouth. Rome threaded her fingers through the silken gold, doing nothing but bringing him closer. Cailan pressed her against the wall, hooking her leg around his waist. The slit in her dress caused gooseflesh to rise against the cooling air.

"Cailan… Please." She breathed out softly.

"I am truly sorry to be placing you in this position but there been nothing I've wanted more for the past year."

She gave him a sad smile before softly pushing him away.

"Cailan… We've been over this. You're to be married to Anora. Not I."

"Would you truly deny yourself and I what we want?"

"Yes. I would. Now if you would excuse me, I have things I would like to oversee."

"You damnably frustrating woman!" He exclaimed as she unlocked the door.

"Our relationship can be nothing more than professional. I will see you tonight, King Cailan." She murmured, taking the long route back to her rooms. Kuma awaited her. He sensed her bad mood and she kneeled down to him. He rested his chin on her shoulder when she hugged him.

He thought comforting thoughts as she sobbed her eyes out.

* * *

He watched from a distance as Rome kneeled in the grass. A soft look graced her face as the tiny ducklings waddled to her. Even the matriarch rubbed her head against Rome's dress. The dusky twilight sun poured its glow over her. She looked so beautiful.

He didn't think he had ever had a woman turn him away so insistently. What if he would just give in to her? To forsaking Anora and marrying her? He couldn't. Loghain had practically raised him along with his father. He couldn't do that to Loghain. Or Anora.

Although he would gain the backing of Bryce Cousland, one of the most important nobles of Ferelden. He had backing in Orlais, most unlike Loghain who was not welcome within a hundred feet of the border.

"You are not sneaky as you'd like to think, Cailan." Her voice was soft but threatening at the same time.

"How…?"

"You don't get trained for your whole life as a rogue to just not notice people when they watch you."

Cailan took small steps to her. He sat next to her, letting her place a duckling in his hands. It looked up at him and quacked loudly. She giggled, Rome Ella Cousland gave a giggle.

"He wants you to pet him." Rome explained. She watched as he carefully stroked the duckling's head with one finger. Her gaze turned to two ducks swimming in a circle in the pond, rippling the water.

"When the ducks mate, they mate for life." She told him quietly. He looked up to her. Her gaze was locked onto the two ducks. "They always come back to the place they mated."

"What happens if they get separated or die?" He asked.

"I don't know. And I honestly don't want to."

She put down the duckling, watching as he waddled back to the pond, following the matriarch. Cailan's duckling did the same. He placed his hand over Rome's and squeezed. She gave a sad smile.

* * *

Rome walked through the winding halls after she had finished tending to the ducks. Kuma trailed her silently. He knew how delicate she was right now. He was the only one. The servants were already done for the night; most of them were probably already asleep or tending to minor things, leaving the halls empty.

Something moved behind her, flanking her. She turned quickly, dagger out. It grazed nothing but armor. The man before her gave her a nasty glare. He grabbed her by the throat, slamming her into the wall behind her. Her breath left in a hurry, leaving her wheezing. Stars sprinkled in her vision. Her dagger clattered against the floor.

"You will leave Cailan alone. Do _you understand me_."

He loosened his grip on her throat just enough for her to respond. Rome spat at him.

"You will not tell me what to do! Thank the Maker, you are not my father and you will never be half the man he is!"

"I don't care about your father. You're the one whoring around with Cailan, hoping to snatch queen-ship from my daughter."

"I am not trying to steal anything from your daughter! I am simply good friends with Cailan."

"Do not lie to me."

Kuma was snarling behind them. _Don't_. She thought hurriedly.

"I'm not. I promise you, Loghain. I just wish to comfort him in this difficult time."

Loghain snarled.

"I do not believe you, and if I catch whiff of Cailan with the Cousland whore again I will make sure you're sent home with much worse than a bruised throat." He squeezed her throat, cutting off her breath for a few seconds before stalking off. She collapsed against the floor, Kuma sniffing worriedly at her. She tried her hardest to use any leverage she could to stand but she couldn't.

Kuma ran off, and she cursed. Fucking dog. She ambled up on extremely shaky legs. She gingerly touched her neck, almost letting out a sob at how badly it hurt. Her head hurt even worse. The world was spinning and she was going down.

* * *

She woke up in her rooms, head bandaged. Cailan was asleep next to her bed. She touched her neck and it didn't hurt as badly but it still hurt. Kuma whined at her, lowering his head and closing his eyes.

"You aren't in trouble." She murmured, causing him to crawl closer to her. She touched his short fur, whispering to him. "Our King over there isn't so lucky. He has a whole kingdom to take care of. A future wife… He can't be worried about some unimportant girl who has no business wanting him."

Kuma whined sympathetically, licking her hand. She could hear repeated thoughts of it's okay. She was startled by a hand resting on her hand.

"How are you feeling?"

"Like the Fade swallowed me up and spit me out. Who all knows?"

"Just the Elf girl who healed you. Kuma came and got me."

"Where is she?"

"Do you need her? I'll go get her." Cailan rose from his seat and out the door. Rome waited as he brought the girl back. She had long dark brunette hair. She was tiny, and beautiful.

"I just wished to say thank you. I would also kindly appreciate any discretion you could spare…"

The girl had a fire in her eyes. A fire that Rome was sure that only she saw.

"Of course m'lady. If you wouldn't mind, I'd like to check over your wounds."

Rome obliged, letting the girl change her bandages and to try to heal her throat again. When she was finished she bowed once more and told Rome she'd be back in a few hours and not to strain herself, not with a head injury like that.

Cailan handed her a glass of water and she guzzled it down.

"Who did this, love?" He asked softly. Rome looked away.

"It's not something you need concern yourself with."

Cailain stood, fists clenched. She could see the vein in his throat almost popping.

"I found you _bleeding out _in a hallway! Do you even know how I feel about that!? That you're being too stubborn to just tell me who in the Void did this to you! Do you know why?"

She nodded, blinking away tears that were an all too real threat. Cailan kneeled next to her, placing his cheek against hers. She moved her lips so they were at his ear.

"Why, love?" Her fingers rose and danced against his chin which was cloaked with stubble. Her words weren't even a whisper and he strained to make out what she said.

"I'm perceived as a threat."

* * *

As much as Cailan begged for her to tell him who was behind her injuries, she didn't budge. The Fereldan girl also did not stray from the Castle. She knew she was playing with fire, but she didn't care. She would not tuck her tail between her legs and run home to mommy and daddy. There was a firm refusal.

At dinner that night, she sat at Cailan's right while Anora sat on his left. In Ferelden it was customary for the wife to sit on the right. It had shown that Anora was no longer in the king's good graces, neither was her father. Servants whispered behind their hands about what the pair had possibly done to anger Cailan or the Cousland.

Loghain spent the night with a scowl on his face. Anora's nose was raised and she refused to participate in Cailan and Rome's conversation over 'Love Amongst Dragons'. Cailan hadn't had to coax any emotion out of her. Her eyes bright amber eyes shone with emotion. The Cousland girl motioned something with her hands and Cailan gave a hearty laugh. His laugh caused Rome to grin.

Anora excused herself, not even waiting for Cailan to allow it before storming out of the room. Rome's grin was lost. The rest of the dinner was cool, and Rome retreated as soon as protocol would allow. She set about packing her bags that night when the little Elf came and visited her.

"You're leaving so soon? And with your injuries?"

Rome motioned her to sit with one hand, stuffing a book into a bag with another.

"I'm a Cousland daughter, my injuries are nothing compared to what my family has faced for generations against Orlais."

"Well, you aren't in a war. And you are most certainly not your ancestor. If you are so insistent on leaving, would you at least let me travel with you to make sure of your wellbeing?"

"I don't even know your name. Besides, won't you be missed here?"

"My name is Nonna. And no. I don't believe I will."

"Pleased to make your acquaintance, Lady Nonna." Rome curtsied before resuming her packing.

"Oh no-no no no. I'm just Nonna. You don't have to bow to me." The little Elf was quite flustered. Rome turned a eye to the girl.

"If you won't accept me bowing, I will not bow. But you will not either."

Nonna said nothing.

"Are you going to tell him?"

"Yes. He deserves that much."

* * *

She found him in the gardens. He donned plain clothing. She sat next to him.

"I'm leaving."

"Please don't. You don't have to." She turned her body towards him.

"Cailan. I do. I'm just causing more problems for you to handle. You have enough to worry about."

"Just leave then! Everyone else does, why should you be any different?" She leaned forward, cupping his cheek. She kissed him once.

"Because me being here is questioning your engagement, it's making you question everything. I can't stand around knowing just my very presence kills you inside. I'm doing this because I love you."

"When you love someone you don't leave, Rome."

Tears glittered in her eyes. She let the tears fall.

"Sometimes if you love someone. You have to let them go. You have to let me go Cailan. You won't break off your engagement and I won't sit around just to become the mistress of a king."

She stood, and ran like a coward from him. Her ship departed early the next morning.

* * *

Fergus was livid when he saw her. Her neck was discolored and she was still bandaged. He demanded to know what happened. She had not the heart to tell him Loghain almost knocked her unconscious because of a threat she didn't think she posed. She begged for him to not say anything. She would blame it on a training accident.

He glared viciously at her. The little elven girl didn't shy away from Fergus; instead, she stepped in front of Rome and bared her teeth. Fergus raised his eyebrow, unsure what to think of his sister being protected fully by a lithe elf.

"Have you no compassion? She is quite obviously not in the state to be bothered by your insistence on what happened. If Lady- if Rome wished to tell you, she would have."

Fergus backed off, giving Rome a look which she knew to mean that she wasn't out of trouble yet. He left almost silently. Rome sighed, shoulders drooping.

"Thank you, Nonna. If anyone knew… It'd cause…"

Nonna's fingers touched Rome's hand, before finally taking it. Rome allowed herself a small smile. Nonna had taken such care with her. In a different state of mind, she would have been offended at being treated like a fragile doll.

"I understand. Now come, you need rest."

_-One Year Later-_

Rome ducked a vicious fireball directed at her. The sun beat down on the two of them. Kuma yelped from behind them, tail singed from the passing heat. Nonna was instantly distracted by the dog. She walked right past Rome, kneeling down to Kuma. Her hands coated in blue as she concentrated on healing the small burn.

She felt steel press against her back.

"You turned your back to me." She heard. The voice was hard and lecturing but softness hid in the words. "If I had wished you harm, I could have punctured a lung."

"Good thing for me I know you wouldn't hurt me."

Rome scoffed, sheathing her dagger with a familiar rustle of returning the dagger to its leather. She held out her hand for Nonna, and the girl who had become her sister grasped her hand. The elf's hand gripped the rogue's arm, and Rome did the same. Rome nodded once before letting go.

Rome had protected Nonna with the same ferocity, giving every excuse in the book to keep her as her lady. Rome would not give up one of her truest friends. It was a selfish move, but Maker forgive her she didn't want to let go of the elven girl.

She grabbed a towel, wiping at her forehead. They were headed to Fergus' room to inform him of her father's departure. It was supposed to have been done earlier but she had gotten distracted. Her father wouldn't, couldn't be mad.

Fergus was with Orianna and Orion, her sister in law and beloved nephew.

"Aunty Rome!"

She grinned, picking the little boy up and spinning him around. He giggled when she put him down.

"Again! Again!"

"Give me a moment, Orion. I have to speak with your father." Rome sat Orion down before meeting Fergus' eyes. He eyed the elf behind him warily but said nothing.

* * *

Duncan leads her across the bridge. She's deathly silent. Nonna is worriedly watching Rome, along with their surroundings. Duncan seemed trustworthy and honest enough, but she couldn't be completely sure. Rome isn't dressed in finery; her golden eyes convey nothing but tiredness. Nonna wants to shield her from all of these people.

Rome's eyes catch golden hair, and the eyes of a tired King. She craves to reach out to him. But she doesn't. Instead she bows deeply to her liege.

"Rome… I didn't expect you to be here."

"Yes well, life has a funny way of throwing us the unexpected. Where is Fergus? It's imperative that I speak with him."

"He's out scouting the wilds." Cailan lowers his voice. "Did something… happen?"

She raises her chin and Nonna is in awe how well she hides the hurt in her tone.

"_Arl_ Howe slaughtered my family, and everyone at Castle Cousland."

Cailan's hazel eyes widen slightly and Rome swallows thickly.

"I am so sorry, but it is much too dangerous for anyone who doesn't know the area to go scouring the wilds for a scouting team who could be anywhere. As soon as the army is finished here, we will turn the army north and Howe will face justice."

Rome nodded; eyes hard.

* * *

She waited until Nonna had fallen asleep before sneaking through camp. Mostly everyone was sleeping, gathering all the energy they could for tomorrow's battle. Cailan's guard was surprisingly easy to sneak past, at least with Kuma as a slight distraction.

Cailan's smiling. He motions for her to sit next to him. He knew she would come. She always does. He cups her cheek.

"My beautiful Rome."

She closes her eyes, and lets him pull her to him. In a great show of emotion, that no one has seen, she cries against his chest. He strokes her back and places a kiss at her temple. There was simplicity. He wasn't king, and she wasn't a high noble's daughter.

Just Cailan and Rome.

His fingers touched her cheek, wiping the tears away gently. She kissed him furiously, wanting nothing more than to feel his body against hers.

"Cailan… I love you." She murmurs, quite unsure of herself and her situation.

"I know. I still love you too. Did you quite honestly think I would stop?"

She shrugs her small shoulders.

"I thought you would be so angry at my leaving you would actually try to make your marriage with Anora work. Just to spite me."

"I would do nothing to spite you."

* * *

Nonna wraps a blanket around her. Alistair sits across from her, a campfire in the middle of them. It's almost silent. Morrigan walks to them, hips swaying. Alistair sends a barb Morrigan's way, and she eagerly retaliates.

"Could you two shut up for two minutes?" Rome snaps, and Nonna tenses.

"Oh does the pretty noble miss her quiet…" Morrigan is quickly shut up by Nonna.

"Could you have some actual consideration for other humans every once in a while? I know you've not had the chance to interact with _actual_ human beings most of your life but that gives you absolutely no right to treat others like they are inferior."

Morrigan started to say something but stopped quickly when Rome stood.

"I've just lost _everything_. I'm not asking for the world to burn, I'd just like a night of quiet." Her words tremble and she quickly retreats. No one says anything. Nonna starts to go after her but Alistair shakes his head.

It's a while before she returns but she does. Everyone but Alistair has gone to bed. He stands and fumbles with his words.

"I'm so sorry… I was going on about Duncan and the others and I hadn't quite realized…"

Rome's tired. She stops him before he makes himself feel any worse. She knows it was meant as a apology but…

"You do not have to apologize for grieving. Thank you for the thought though. I…" She clears her throat, ashamed to even ask this. "Would you stay up with me until I fall asleep? I've had little sleep…"

Alistair sees the emotions swirling under the calm façade. He nods. It's the least he could do for her.

"Of course."

She lets out a breath she didn't know she was holding.

"Thank you…"

* * *

Anora is not pleased at the situation. She is not pleased to have been rescued by Rome and Alistair and their merry band of _misfits_. The woman is flaunting. Rome took Cailan before Anora even had a chance. And now she had the bastard of Maric wrapped around her finger.

Power hungry, was she?

She watches Alistair. He stands behind her, letting her make the decisions. He is not so much different from Cailan. She's stiff, and cold. Anora wonders the appeal she's made to both the Theirin boys. Anora herself doesn't see it.

So she calls in Alistair, who is rightly suspicious of her. But she speaks softly, charmingly even. She can see Alistair's distaste from her end of the table. She beckons him closer and he barely moves. She tells him she means no harm that she just wants to talk.

"What do you see in her?"

Alistair gives her a confused look.

"Rome, what could you possibly see in her? Explain it to me."

"She's just… Rome. She has a heart of gold. She lost her whole life and didn't let it stop her from uniting everyone."

In the dim candlelight she can see Cailan's features. An anger surges in her, but she bites it back. The same look passes over Alistair's face.

"And that is what made you fall for her? Battle prowess? Ability to lead an army?"

"I… No. It's not. She listened. She makes me feel important when I know I'm not. She loves me for me. I could not ask her for more."

Anora seethed.

"Have you considered you are a replica of her dead lover? That the only reason she wants anything to do with you at all is because you look like Cailan?"

She hit a nerve, she knew. Just another way Cailan ruined his life. Anora raised her chin. Alistair stood, and he towered over the small blonde. He was seething, his teeth were ground against each other. She could smell his musk, that's how close he was. He gripped Anora's chin in his hand.

"No. I am not. And I will not listen to your lies, because you will do what you want to get the throne. I do not know how to play your court games, but I see right through you. I do not need Rome whispering in my ear to know what a cunning she-devil you are."

He let her go and turned. Anora touched her chin gently. Her father would know what to do about this.

* * *

Rome sat across from Alistair at breakfast that morning. She took a cup of coffee, while reading some important looking documents. Alistair watches her. She's too busy with her documents to notice. If she does, she doesn't look up. He studies her prominent cheekbones, the way she purses her lips when she's deep in thought. He can see the cogs going in her mind, even if he wouldn't be able to understand half of what she was thinking of.

"Were you involved with Cailan?" He asks finally, after a few moments of gaining the courage. Her golden eyes flash dangerously. She then slumps in her chair and sighs.

"You deserve the truth, not lies." She bites her lip, the memories obviously still painful. Quite painful. He regrets asking for a moment.

"I was involved with Cailan. For a _very_ long time. He had obligations of being king and engaged. Engaged to someone who wasn't me."

He saw a tear slip, followed by another and another. She wipes them away, and he can tell she's fighting heavily.

"It was a lifetime ago though. I was different, young. My only worries were Cailan, or working on my political skills. I loved him so very much. I will always love him. But I refuse to pine over a dead man, Maker bless his soul."

"I know it was hard, but thank you for telling me the truth."

She gives him a smile, a forced one. Her eyes are screwed shut. It's likely this is the first time someone's confronted her about Cailan and she couldn't dodge the question.

"Did it quell the fears Anora put in your head?"

"What? How did you know…?"

She laughed once, a horrid sound that sounded like a cross between a sob and a laugh.

"I know Anora. I know all of her dirty tricks. This is just one of them. Let me guess, she said I'm only so enamored with you because of your dead brother."

* * *

A/n: This is incomplete, I know. It will most likely stay that way. I _love_ this story. This is one of the stories that I've babied for a while. I've added to and edited over and over. When I played DA I found the Cailan/Cousland relationship _so _interesting. What if there wasn't a Blight and Cousland was slightly older? Multiple variables.

I'm so sorry it was ended on a loose and abrupt end but I don't know.

Once again and as always, your reading and your reviews and follows mean so much to me. They encourage me especially with a story like this.


	2. Chapter 2

"Cailan!" Her voice resounded through the thick airs of the Fade. Cailan was there and he was so very alive. She thudded against his chest, her fingers threading through waves of gold.

"My dear love, you act as if we've been apart forever." His eyes worriedly scanned her face. She pulled him down to her, so she was able to kiss him. Tears streaked down Rome's face as her mind and heart fought against each other.

"We have dearest." It was so easy to fall into the lull of the dream(nightmare?) and back into Cailan's arms.

"Matthew has been waiting for you to finish your duties with the council and to tuck him in." Cailan kissed her softly, whispering his love into her ear before he disappeared into thin air. He was replaced by a little boy in bed, fidgeting around and watching intently for her. He was a handsome young boy. He had golden eyes that were a mirror of her own and golden hair. Just like Maric and Cailan's.

"Mommy!" He jumped out of bed to greet her. Rome held the young boy against her, squeezing her eyes shut. She wanted this to continue for a few more moments. Even if it was fake. Even if it was some sort of cruel fairytale that the Maker himself had dreamt up for her. She looked down at the little boy. He was so handsome. He was a perfect mixture of the two prominent Fereldan families. You could tell he was a Theirin just by looking but if you studied him you could see Byrce and Fergus Cousland in the little boy.

"Rome." Her name spoken by Nonna broke her free of the dream the Fade had dreamt up for her. The little boy was no longer in her arms; instead she was watching from a distance as Cailan and the little boy interacted. They were both smiling, and so far away from her. She could stay here, in the Fade. With the both of them. With the child she was never meant to have, along with Cailan. Her beautiful golden Cailan.

She turned and faced her companions. Nonna's eyes were filled with a deep sadness, along with Zevran's. There was a mixture of sadness and pity and hurt in Alistair's eyes. Maker, she must've looked pathetic. Zevran held out his hand for her.

"Come my rogue princess. We have a fade demon to defeat."

She smiled at the assassin and took his hand.

I know I said I wasn't going to add more to this verse but I was inspired by this, watch?v=Z8lHS_rx6gE

I'm going to have go do something to make myself feel better for doing this to Rome now. Oh my goodness I hurt for her in this verse!


End file.
